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Ideas, insights and inspiration for people on the go December 24, 2004 |
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Editor’s Scribbles
This is my favorite time of year. I love the lights and the decor and there’s just so much going on - the holidays, the shopping, the food, the presents, the entertaining. Not to mention the hole all of this is going to burn in our pockets (LOL).
Well, as long as ‘tis the season, let’s find out how you can be happy all year round. Even if you don’t feel too happy about spending the holidays alone this year, remember there’s many others around the world who are feeling the same way.
And yes, I do have an article today that will help you deal with that. In fact, having a little peace and quiet on a holiday may not be so bad after all. It may be just what many of us need but can’t seem to find.
If you have a second to spare, please let me know how you feel about this ezine: Love it, look forward to reading it - click here Don’t like it, not my cup of tea - click here
Feel free to include any additional feedback, suggestions, ideas, questions. I’m happy to hear what you have to say :o) Knowing what you’d like to see in this ezine helps me customize it better.
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays. This season, spare a thought for the less fortunate. Have fun and stay safe.
Kit Editor/Publisher Website: http://MinuteChaser.Go-GetGlobal.com Email: chaser@go-getglobal.com
Brainwave 7 Things Happy People Know How to Do By Kathy Gates Ever notice how some people just seem to be able to be content and bounce back no matter what the circumstances? Research shows that this isn’t a gift or a talent – it’s a skill that they have developed. Surprised? Well, the real surprise is that you too can put to work their techniques and make your life happier too. 1. Happy people cooperate with life. Each person has a destiny to fulfill. You can fight it or cooperate with it. Does that mean you just lay back and let life happen? No. But you can adopt the attitude that you will play the cards you are dealt the very best you can. When you begin to cooperate with life, you will notice new ways in which you are motivated. Life wants you to realize your destiny. Wouldn’t you rather cooperate than battle with life? 2. Happy people don’t just think positive, they act positive. Thinking positive definitely has its place, and you’ll need to change your thoughts to ever be truly happy. But don’t wait on the feelings to come. You have direct control over how you act and what you think (feelings and physiology are indirectly affected). If you want to be a happier person, act happier. If you want to be a more compassionate person, act more compassionate. If you want to be a friendlier person, act friendlier. The feelings will follow. 3. Happy people ask for what they need. Good things don’t generally just fall out of the sky. Complaining gets you nothing, except to attract you to other complainers. If you believe that “you reap what you sow”, then asking for what you want makes much more sense than sowing complaints. It’s your choice-- you can choose to point fingers and assign blame, and still end up with nothing. Or you can simply ask. 4. Happy people are willing to change. It’s contrary to all laws of nature for things to stand still. If you try to make that happen, you’ll always be disappointed. If you let fear of change stop you, you are in essence *agreeing* to not having what you want. You can believe that change will harm you and resist it. Or you can embrace it and believe that it will help you. It all depends on what you decide to believe. 5. Happy people don’t allow themselves to be defeated. A failure or set back does not mean that the goal will never be yours, nor is it evidence that you should quit. It simply means that you need more practice, more experience. Be willing to make mistakes. Don’t give up. Don’t allow one slipup, or setback from the outside, influence you to erase all the progress you’ve made. Feel the joy of the finish line! 6. Happy people live in the present. If you are alert to the present, and anticipating the future, you are better able to take advantage of opportunities. If you are brooding over the past, you’ll be blinded to present possibilities, and lose the advantage for future prospects. A happy life is the product of living a great present. And a well lived present is a guarantee of a wonderful future. You can only affect your future by what you do today. 7. Happy people plan ahead. Happy people know that they must exercise mastery in their lives, show control in their life in order to guard against feelings of being helpless and victims. Planning is essential to getting things done. Planning is essential to making sure you are spending time on your priorities, and not just the next thing that gets your attention. Plan for what’s important to you, and choose to spend your limited time, money, energy, and resources on it. ----- About the author: Kathy Gates is a Professional Life Coach in Scottsdale Arizona. What is Life Coaching? I help people become better satisfied with their lives by making some changes, or pursuing a goal. Visit www.reallifecoach.com for information, products and services and sign up for her free newsletter kathy@reallifecoach.com
Modern Living Alone on a Holiday? Five Ways to Transform Loneliness into Solitude by Cathy Goodwin Q. I just moved to a new state to take a new job. Just before moving, my relationship broke up. So now I am away from my family and close friends. Any tips for surviving the holidays on my own? A. You may be alone on the holiday, but you're not alone with this question. Every year I get dozens of queries like this one. (I also get asked, "How can I hide from my family this year?" but that's another article.) Here are five of my own highly biased, irreverent tips to survive and thrive a solo holiday. 1. Scratch the stereotypes. Many of us have come to believe that, "If we're alone on a holiday, something's wrong with us." I've met people who are so terrified of being alone they'll spend hours with people who range from insulting to tiresome to abusive. And I've met people who actually enjoy their holiday solitude: they'd rather curl up with a good book and a new DVD, thank you very much. Lots of people are alone - many by choice. No need to feel guilty or weird. 2. Avoid invitations that feel like "any port in a storm." When you're new on the job, often colleagues will invite you to spend the holidays, or at least come for dinner. I recommend using caution. Most people need time to figure out who's what in a new organization, not to mention the families of your new colleagues. Often these invitations lead to rich, rewarding relationships. But other times you find yourself witnessing an embarrassing family confrontation, after which your colleague avoids you for the next month. Or you discover your colleague had a hidden agenda relating to the job. Or you discover your colleague's family didn't really want company. My biased perspective: Better to survive a tough day than to set up a situation that could haunt you for weeks. 3. Create plans so you can truthfully say, "Yes, I have a place to go." You can always change your mind. With good weather and highway access, you can drive to a nearby town for some sight-seeing. Consider a day in the park, preferably with your dog, or a long walk on the beach. Make arrangements to call friends and family in faraway places. With enough time and money, you can travel even longer distances. I've met lots of people who go to ski resorts, casinos, or foreign countries to escape major holidays. Accept invitations only if you're really excited about saying yes. Your hosts will pick up your enthusiasm and you'll be welcomed as an honored guest, not a stray visitor. 4. Offer to volunteer - if you're really needed and you really want to do something. In my experience, soup kitchens, humane societies and other charitable organizations tend to be inundated with volunteers on major holidays. My suspicion: Lots of people will do just about anything to escape their families! Check out options and make sure you'll be put to work. Don't feel guilty if you'd rather do something else: involuntary volunteers are not conducive to holiday cheer. 5. Keep busy. Make a list of things you want to do on the holiday itself. Some people create rituals; others plan one year at a time. Include provisions for rain, snow, hurricanes and unexpected phone calls. Faced with list on a snowy day, you may decide you'd rather do nothing. But having a "to do" list gives your day a sense of purpose and who knows? You may actually accomplish something you really value, such as a chapter on your new novel or a piece of art you can share. Get absorbed and you'll forget you're supposed to be having a holiday. A final word: When you go back to work, you'll be asked, "How was your holiday?" There's only one answer - no matter what. "It was terrific!" Share your frustrations only with a very close friend - someone not connected to your career or business - or hire someone who can listen confidentially. ----- About the author: Cathy Goodwin, Ph.D., is an author, speaker and career/business consultant. Your Next Move Ezine: Read one weekly and watch your choices grow! mailto:subscribe@cathygoodwin.com. "Promote your website free" http://www.cathygoodwin.com/promotefree.html Contact: mailto:cathy@cathygoodwin.com
Offpeak Hours Do You have the Right Water for Brewing Tea? Many people know that the quality of tea leaves is very important for brewing a good cup of tea. However, not many people realize that the water that they use to brew tea is as important, if not more important, for brewing a good cup of tea. Mr. Zhang Dafu of Ming dynasty wrote in his Mei Hua Cao Tang Bi Tan that “Tea leaves need water to be brewed into a good cup of tea. 100% quality water can brew 80% quality tea leaves into a 100% quality cup of tea. On the other hand, 80% quality water can only brew 100% quality tea leaves into an 80% quality cup of tea.” Lu Yu had detail discussions about tea brewing water in his famous tea book Cha Jing (Tea Bible). Generally speaking, hard water is not good for brewing tea. Water with PH value of greater than 7 may darken color of tea liquor and lighten taste of tea. After selecting the right type of water, boiling water is the next important step. Cai Xiang of Song dynasty said in his tea book Cha Lu that “To boil water is the most difficult task. Foams will show up if water is not ready. Leaves will fell to bottom if water is over boiled…” When boiling water for brewing tea, people should use high heat to bring the water to rapid boiling. Over boiled water is not suitable for brewing tea. For more tea related discussions, please visit our site at www.teahub.com
Over Coffee
This week’s question is:
How will you be spending the holidays this year?
Submit your response (it doesn’t have to be an essay, just a few lines will do :o), and your 3-line by 60-character classified here. I’ll be posting your responses here next week. |
IN THIS ISSUE Editor’s Scribbles Brainwave 7 Things Happy People Know How to Do Modern Living Alone on a holiday? Five ways to transform loneliness to solitude Offpeak Hours Do You have the Right Water for Brewing Tea? Co-op Ads Over Coffee Send in your response and your free classified ad
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Issue 0412-24. Copyright 2004-2005 Minute Chaser Ezine. All rights reserved in all countries. |
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Hello fellow Chasers, both regular and new readers. Well, what do you know? Christmas is just hours away. Already?
