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Ideas, insights and inspiration for busy people on the go Friday, May 6, 2005 |
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Editor’s Scribbles
I’m really excited about today’s issue because I’ve got a couple of really great contemporary articles for you.
Let’s face it, happiness has become more and more the talk of these past decade or two. Ultimately between making money and raising a family, the other thing we’re after is happiness.
It’s so obvious, our pursuit of happiness - we chase down good food, we chase down exotic destinations, leave it to us to find something to celebrate every day (thanks in part to the media constantly dreaming up even more reasons and more ways for us to celebrate! bless their business minds LOL)
The best thing about happiness is it’s not just about yourself. You can find happiness even by making others happy. The age-old concept of ‘charity begins at home’ is fantastic ‘cos you can get your family and kids involved.
See, this is how it works. While you’re doing a good deed as a family, you’re actually spending quality time together, inculcating good values in your kids and bringing joy to others as well. How fantastic is that?! Mmm, love the idea!!
With these good thoughts in mind, go out and have yourself a super Mother’s Day weekend. Still stuck for a Mother’s Day gift idea? You can’t go wrong with Reclaiming Her Identity: A Mother’s Diary. See you back here next week
Kit Editor/Publisher Website: http://MinuteChaser.Go-GetGlobal.com Email: chaser@go-getglobal.com
Modern Living Happiness as a Habit by Sonya Green Health and Happiness are the two things that most people will tell you they desire most. Ask a parent what they want most for their child and they will almost always say, “I really don’t care, as long as they are healthy and happy.” Sometimes people say they want love, success or wealth, but when asked why, they think for a moment and then say because these things would make them happy. Usually people desire health above all else but only when they feel that it is threatened. People rarely think about health when they are young, fit, pain and disease free. The single most sought after life experience is happiness. If you made a list of the things you wished to improve in your life and then added notes alongside each item, detailing the amount of time and effort you were putting into each one, you would be greatly surprised at the lack of logic and or commitment you are applying to increasing or maintaining happiness. You may have happiness as the thing you most desire but your notes may reveal you spend 50 hours a week at your career, 10 hours housekeeping and 20 hours watching T.V. Next to the word ‘Happiness’ you may find, ‘10 minutes’ or more likely, ‘No time at all’. Have you ever even stopped to think about what it is that makes you happy? Has it ever dawned on you to actively pursue happiness? Most of us simply consider happiness to be a random act that catches us fleetingly and disappears all too soon. Happiness has fascinated me my entire life, I constantly seek it and play with it. I’m getting better at prolonging it and faster at recognizing it. Honestly, sometimes I just sit and focus on happiness until, “I bring it on”. It takes a little concentration, sometimes some memory and sometimes imagination. Practise and focus have resulted in my ability to simply decide to be happy and I remind myself to do this often. I used to wait and be surprised and delighted when something caused me to be happy until I realized I could actually get happiness without an event or situation. When happiness comes accidentally it entices us to, “be in the moment”. Most of us are mentally in a perpetual state of being in the past or future most of the time. In happiness, we pull our attention into the present moment to fully experience this great feeling. (Pain also has this ability.) I mention this, as I know that the most essential requirement for happiness is to practise, ‘Living in the present moment’. Happiness is a present moment experience. A couple of my other favourite quotes, which illustrate this point, are: Life is what happens while your busy making other plans. (John Lennon) This is not a dress rehearsal – This is your life. These days will one day become the good old days. Between the wanting and the getting – Is the living. We all wait for happy events to come and find us or we sometimes actively seek out things that we believe will bring us happiness. Winning money, buying a big-ticket item, getting married, having a child, a holiday, a promotion or finding a new lover are usually considered to be happy events. Many of us spend a great amount of time, effort and money actively pursuing these things. Unfortunately these things come with a ‘Happiness expiry date’. Ironically, we often find our happiness list reverses on us at a later date. We then hear, “I’ll be happy when my divorce comes through, when I retire, when the kids leave home.” The car you once dreamed about owning is now just a costly mode of transport. Your bride has become your witch and your home is cluttered with things you long forgot you even possess. Happiness is not about having - Happiness is about being. We have all heard it before but we must constantly remind our selves, ‘Happiness comes from within’. Happiness is internally generated not externally manufactured. Happiness is not a tonic with a recipe; I cannot give you a list of things to do to guarantee your happiness. Some people seem to never be happy, no matter what and yet other people are just filled with joy for the simplest reasons. Most of the time I am happy for no particular reason at all other than the fact that I choose to be. There are two basic principles that I do consider to be imperative; One; Is actively pursue, maintain, expand and share happiness. Two; Is minimize, eliminate and repel unhappiness. The most important aspect of happiness is to choose what thoughts you will entertain and which thoughts you will dismiss. Eliminate what you hate. This is going to sound a little obvious but it’s amazing when you get down to it, just how much grief you may be hanging onto without ever giving it any serious thought at all. “How much of your time, emotion and energy are you wasting on maintaining things that make you unhappy?” Some people spend their entire working life is jobs that are almost soul destroying. Many people stay in relationships that are physically, mentally and emotionally draining. We may have friends, colleagues, neighbours or relatives that simply, ‘drive us crazy’ and yet we maintain them. Some people hold on to addictions or habits that time and again bring about the same destructive outcome and yet they still go around and around repeating the cycle over and over. If you are serious about increasing your happiness level you must first define what makes you unhappy and take action to eliminate it. Being unhappy robs us of our health by depleting our energy. Love and happiness are the highest and lightest forms of energy. This higher, lighter form of energy is self-generating. Unhappiness robs us of energy and if left unchecked will lead to depression and tiredness. Your energy level is a great way to measure your happiness or your stress level. It is also gives you an accurate indication of your health in general. Happiness and love will fill you with energy and a good supply of energy will bring you more joy. If it brings your Grief – Make it Brief. Where is your focus and what is your perception? Almost every terrible thing that ever happened to you only happened in your imagination. Just think back over the last year and remind yourself of the things that had you tossing and turning in bed at night. Try and recall all the things that really had you worried, scared or upset. How many actually happened? And of the ones that did happen, how many were anywhere near as bad as you had imagined? Stepping up and stepping out of our comfort zones. You know the saying, “One door closes and another door opens.” I’ve often been very frustrated with this, as I wondered, “Why doesn’t the new door ever open before the old door closes?” It seems to me that more often than not, my doors close long before the new doors open and I have spend a long time being panicked in corridors. It’s scary! Life gives us many situations in which we lose our comfort zone long before our new life is revealed to us. Ah, life in limbo! We handle it badly, but a fact of life it is. In reinventing yourself you are going to have to accept that limbo is not only a high probability but you are also going to have to actively take yourself there deliberately. I have often thought of my life pushing me up an arduous mountain and leaving me with no way of going back, I imagine fire moving swiftly behind me, threatening me and pushing me forward. When I reach the top of the mountain I realize I must jump or be engulfed by the fire. The terror of believing I will either be burned to death or smashed against the rocks at the bottom of the mountain has me completely immobilized. Then somewhere in the back of my mind I hear a voice, “Jump, you can fly!” If you want small, safe changes to occur in your life then the effort and risk will not be so frightening but if you really wish to “Step out and step up” You had better accept that you will need to be Bold and Brave. You will never fly if you won’t leave the ground. ----- About the author: Sonya Green West Australian Author and Personal Growth workshop facilitator. Writer and producer of guided meditations and webmaster of http://www.reinventingmyself.com
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Offpeak Hours Hold a Child’s Birthday Party for Charity by Rachel Goldstein As a parent, you probably know that the birthday party routine can be an almost painful experience. With about 20 children in your child's class, going to more than one birthday party in one weekend can occur quite often. If you have more than one child, birthday-party weekends can take over your entire life. Finding the right gift takes hours, wrapping the present and preparing the card is more time. When it is your child's turn for a birthday party, do you really want to put other parents through the same routine? Will your child really appreciate 20 birthday gifts on top of what you and your family have already given him? Does your child really need more toys? Teaching our child that it's just as wonderful to give as it is to receive is almost never easy. But once they understand the concept, the rewards can last a lifetime. As a parent, you probably want to guide your child to become a healthy and ethical adult. How can you lead your child to a healthy future? What kind of activities can you do together as a family that will steer your child towards becoming a compassionate adult? Community service and Volunteerism are your answer. Not only will you show your child that it is “cool” to care for others, but it will also be a wonderful way to get others involved. You can do just that with a charity birthday party. Firstly, you must discuss this with your child. You can't just announce to your child that some or all of his gifts will be going to charity. Avoid bribing and coercion, the mission is to get your child enthusiastic about helping others. I suggest the following: 1. Know Your Child and How Much He Can Be Expected to Give - Just because you are enthusiastic to give all of your child's presents to charity, it doesn't mean that your child will feel the same way. Again, don't coerce your child to have a charitable party. Discuss with your child different ways that his party can become a means to give and not only to receive. For example, The child can keep half of his presents and the other half go to charity. 2. Know Your Child and His Interests – Each child has interests that can be converted into a great giving and charitable experience. If your child is interested in art, match them up with an art charity (http://www.artistshelpingchildren.org). If your child is interested in homelessness, match your child's party up with a homeless shelter. Once your child is matched with the right charity, your child will have a rewarding charity birthday that he will always remember. 3. The Actual Events of The Party Can Be For a Charitable Purpose – Instead of giving away your child's presents, you can consider holding a charitable project as the entertainment. For example, Charity Making and Stuffing a Teddy Bear Project (http://artistshelpingchildren.org/donateteddybears.html) and donate all of the teddy bears to a local pediatric hospital, orphanage, or shelter. 4. Have Every Child Bring a Used Toy or Item to Give to Charity – Instead of having every child bring a new item to be donated to charity, have everyone bring in a used toy, or other item. These items can then be donated to a non-profit organization. For children who aren't excited about having a charity party, you can have everyone bring in a small gift for the birthday child in addition to a used item. 5. Remember to Still Make the Event Special for The Birthday Child – Don't take all gifts away from your child. You must allow your child to still receive gifts from you, family members, and other close people in his life. 6. Meaningful Conversation First – If our child is having a difficult time figuring out what charity he wants to give to, it might be a good idea to watch the news together and see what sparks your child's interest. Sometimes seeing less fortunate people and suffrage can spark a child into wanting to give. Also, bring up social issues and discuss them with your child. 7. What Do My Parents Do? – Children learn by example. If your child sees you as a giving individual, they will be more likely to want to give of themselves as well. How can you expect your child to give up things that are important to them without giving items yourself. Consider doing something giving at your birthday every year as well. Can Having a Charitable Birthday Party Really Be Good For My Child? You bet it can! It has been proven by researchers that a child’s self-esteem is boosted when taking on altruistic responsibilities. When children help others, they will begin to understand that they have the strength to make a real difference in their world…and this is a great feeling. Another enormous benefit of a charitable birthday party is that a child will gain a deeper understanding of the needs and wants of others. Researchers have also noticed that children who volunteer or give charitably might gain increased academic skills, including critical thinking and problem solving skills. ----- About the author: Rachel Goldstein is Founder of Artists Helping Children – http://www.ArtistsHelpingChildren.org - A non-profit charity dedicated to bringing comfort to children in hospitals, clinics, and shelters by brightening their environment with murals, artwork, toys, and art supplies.
Over Coffee
Here’s a bunch of comments I received from some of our loyal readers.
Janet Emo wrote, “I really enjoyed the article you included about 10 tips to be happy. Just say "No". A word I need to learn.”
Michael Dodd wrote, “Very professional formatted ezine you have!”
Judy Woodson had this to say, “I really enjoy your upbeat attitude. Also, you find articles that I don't see anywhere else, and believe me, I subscribe to TONS of ezines and newsletters! Keep it up, ok?”
I sure will, Judy... and a big thank you to everyone who sent in their comments. Look for your classifieds on our Ad Board.
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IN THIS ISSUE Editor’s Scribbles Modern Living Happiness as a Habit Ad Board Offpeak Hours Hold a Child’s Birthday Party for Charity Over Coffee Win a FREE classified!
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Issue 0505-06. Copyright 2004-2005 Minute Chaser Ezine. All rights reserved in all countries. |
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Hello fellow Chasers. A warm welcome to our current and many new subscribers this week.
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